When your girlfriend wants a child but you are not ready yet

In most relationships, the woman is much more likely to want children than the man. If your partner gazes amorously at prams, stops at baby things in shops, and occasionally makes allusions to the perfection of the family, the desire for a child will be expressed within the foreseeable future. But what to do if you are not ready and do not want to offend your partner?

The fact is, honesty is important and should not simply be ignored when it comes to such an important decision as family planning.

Don't hurt your partner with arguments

There are two primary questions that you should definitely ask yourself when your partner is about to have children. Are you generally not ready for a child or are you not yet at the point in your relationship that you think about family planning?

any factors play a role, including your financial and professional situation. Can you imagine how the relationship with a child works and whether you can maintain your standard of living? If you shake your head at these questions, then you should be honest with your partner and gently explain to her that her wish comes as a surprise to you and you don't want to rush anything. Point out that having a child changes the structure of your life and that you first want to create a basis, for example professionally, before you can start a family and offer something to your wife and child.

Can you even imagine a family with your current partner?

If you cannot imagine a family with your current partner at all, you should under no circumstances give in to her wish and get involved with the offspring. As a man, you don't have the final decision-making power, but you do have the opportunity to influence things through honest conversations and to encourage your partner to reconsider. Give honest reasons why you are not ready for a child and consider this time to be inappropriate. What does not help is the method of considering your partner with love withdrawal and thus avoiding the possibility of pregnancy. The sudden withdrawal would hurt her and make her look for another potential father for her children and end her relationship with you.

Don't ignore their wishes

You cannot and should not ignore a strong desire to have children and act as if everything is as usual and the desire does not exist. Your partner notices exactly when you react with restraint or with a withdrawal and feels hurt by your behavior. Honesty and plausible arguments as to why the time is not yet right for you may also be met with incomprehension, but show your partner that you are thinking about the situation and are not rushing head over heels into a new adventure in your life. Most women understand your words and give you the time you need to make a decision.

listen to your feeling

Never decide against your will. If your partner shows you a strong urge and you cannot (yet) imagine life with a child, you should react honestly and state your reasons. If she doesn't understand it, your life perspectives usually differ very widely.

Never decide against your will. If your partner shows you a strong urge and you cannot (yet) imagine life with a child, you should react honestly and state your reasons. If she doesn't understand it, your life perspectives usually differ very widely.